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News December 1, 2009
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How young is too young for a cell phone?

Gear Diary How young is too young for a cell phone? photo

At what age do kids need cell phones?  It’s a question my wife and I have been struggling with lately.

I’ve heard stories of six year old kids getting iPhones from their parents.  There’s no way we’re prepared to go that route.

My oldest daughter is nine and has been hammering us for a cell phone over the last year.  It’s on her Christmas list this year and she’s recently started an all out campaign to make sure it’s under the tree this year.  By campaign I mean she’s making sure she’s cleaning her room every day, being more responsible with her things etc. All things we as parents try to get her to do regularly.

But the real question is at nine years old does she really need a cell phone?

Two of her best friends have them and that’s probably the cause for the want on her part.  These two friends have parents who are not home as much as we are.  Parents that both work, baby sitters to cover when the kids come home etc.  So I can see their need for wanting their kids to be able to contact them wherever and whenever.  But my daughter’s not in that situation.  One of her parent’s is always home.   She gets off the bus from school and we’re there.

When asked what she’d use a cell phone for her response is “texting my friends and taking pictures.”  If she was older I’d be concerned about the whole “sexting” thing, but I know that’s not an issue, now. I for one question if at nine she even knows how to text, but I guess I don’t give the level of electronic knowledge today’s kids have enough credit.

Money isn’t the issue for us either.  I’m pretty sure I can get a free phone from my provider and add her to my current family plan for a little as $10 per month.  And truthfully a cell phone costs less than some of the other toys she already has, a Nintendo DS for example.

She’s even gone as far as to say she’d be happy with a Firefly type phone (the one’s that only let the kids dial four pre-programmed numbers, pre-programmed by the parents.)

So is there an issue at all?

For now we’ve told her that if she shows us she’s responsible for the next month (takes care of her other gadgets (iPod Shuffle, Nintendo DS etc.) keeps her room clean and otherwise behaves, that’s we’re willing at least to discuss the idea.

Do you have children?  Do they have cell phones?  If they don’t have you struggled with this issue?

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About LarryGreenberg

View all posts by LarryGreenberg
I have always had a passion for gear and gadgets. It all started for me with the release of the very first Palm Pilot. I've always had an interest in handheld electronics. From handheld PDAs, to cell phones, Mp3 players, watches and other products, I'm the first person my friends, family and colleagues call when they need advice on tech. I have roots in the online tech. forum community. I served as the Administrator to Howard Forums.com and as a Moderator at both Treo Central.com and Blackberry Forums.net. Under the screen name “lgreenberg” I've amassed 50,000+ postings. I also manage my own YouTube channel under the user name larrygreenberg. I'm always eager to help.
  • paschott

    Just curious – if her main reasons are texting and taking pictures, the Firefly wouldn’t quite fit that bill. I don’t seem to recall it being able to do either.

    I don’t know the right answer to this and as always “it depends” for each child and family. I can see a cell phone for a lot more kids now than before, but it’s still an odd thing to think about. For our kid, it’s going to be a while. There’s just no good reason for it right now for her or us. :)

  • http://www.graphical-illusion.com Elodie

    I had the same thought about the 4 number phone not doing texting and pics. I don’t have a kid, but I have younger siblings, and I know how many crazy issues my parents had with her and sending text messages that were out of our plan–completely ignoring orders not to. So if I was giving a kid a phone with no limits to stop her from overspending, on accident or not, that would be the part to stress me out a lot. Also potential misbehaving in class, but that can happen with paper notes just as much.

  • jelliott25

    My stepdaughter is thirteen and has had a kajeet phone for about a year now. Kajeet is nice since I can control all inbound and outbound numbers as well as when they can call/text whatever. I think that once kinds start going to the mall with friends and things like that, a cell phone is a value add but there’s no way I’d let my stepdaughter have an unrestricted phone at her age. She’s too stupid about boys and their real motivations and I’m not giving her what amounts to a private communications device that I can’t control or monitor at all. The other nice thing about a cell for a child is the GPS capabilities of some of them. It’s not super accurate but we can at least get a general idea of where she is if need be.

  • Larry Greenberg

    I thought about the texting with the Firefly too, which is why I think she wants a phone just to say she has one. Either that or she doesn’t realize that the Firefly doesn’t do texting.

    I went by AT&T today and had a chat with them. I can get her a decent phone for $50. I have a unlimited family texting plan so that will cost me nothing for her.

    Bottom line is it’ll cost me the $50 for the phone and then an additional $9.99 a month (providing she doesn’t use more than my monthly minutes.)

  • paschott

    That’s pretty cool. Haven’t seen the kajeet before. I’d love it if there were something similar for AT&T so we could add the phone to our plan. I’ll keep an eye on that for some time in the future.

    Larry, if your plan has unlimited texting, you probably don’t need to worry about the minutes being used up. The texting part is the one that scares me the most. I’ve seen too many stories of kids sending (just sending) tens of thousands of messages in a month. Under a limited plan, I can’t even imagine the bill. I think I’d have gone bankrupt.

  • Lex

    Is it need or want ? How about a FRS walkie-talkie radio to play with when girlfriends come over? I have a colleague who caved on the cell when his 12 y.o. son missed a school bus one day and he & his wife were gone for work. Don’t be afraid to wait until there’s a need. You can withstand the pressure! Teaching deferment of gratification is not a hallmark of parenting lately.

  • http://my.opera.com/clym Clymmer

    We just made the blanket decision that 13 years old was the age for cellphones. 7th grade sounded about right and it’s worked out fine in our family. Our youngest is 11 and has been asking us for a phone for the last year or two (his older two sisters are old enough and have phones)…but the answer is the same, “you’re not 13 yet. Just wait.”

    If she want’s to take pictures to send them to her friends, then it sounds like she’d probably like a decent point & shoot digital camera and a facebook account. Just a thought.

  • Larry Greenberg

    The kajeet looks interesting. They have a special right now. $14.99 for unlimited texting and 60 voice minutes a month.

    Yeah it’s more than AT&T but there’s no contract, no activation fee etc.

    The GPS location feature is nice but not for an additional $10 per month.

  • http://www.geardiary.com Michael Anderson

    We added our kids to our plan at ~11 with low end phones. We have been very specific with them – they know we have the right to go through their inbox and sent on a regular basis, and they leave the phones downstairs in off hours. They text more in a month than I do all year, and with all of their activities I don’t regret it for a second.

    But for me it all goes back to justification – there is no legitimate reason for a toddler (<=5 or so) to have a phone, whereas a middle schooler really starts needing one. In between it is very situational.

  • then

    in my country almost all kids have mobile phones when they begin school (at age 7).

  • wyssaj01

    I still remember my first cell phone. I was 15 (December 2002) and it was a Verizon Sony Ericsson T61c. Not only that but it was a SHARED phone between my mom and I and we definitely did not have an unlimited texting plan.

    I didn’t have my own cell phone until we switched to AT&T which was Christmas 2005.

    Honestly, I would consider waiting until there is a need for her to have one. Another option is to buy it now, activate it, and have AT&T suspend (not cancel) the line so you aren’t billed for it until she needs it, but you do have it ready at a moments notice.

  • http://www.geardiary.com Judie Lipsett

    My daughter had a cell phone at 12, Kev’s eldest had one at 9 or so. I think that when you are divorced and children are going back and forth, having a mobile phone of their own becomes a lifeline for the parent and gives the child extra security.

    I look at it as an exercise in teaching them responsibility, and you can always take away the phone if they don’t use it properly. :-)

  • http://www.mormanfh.com sixftunda

    My response to my kids asking for a cell phone is “You’re not allowed to be anywhere without me or mom or some sort of approved adult supervision, so you don’t need one.” I know that is probably a slight oversimplification. Even when the time comes I do get them a cell phone, they will NOT have a camera on their phone. Even if I have to make it inoperable myself if a non-camera phone isn’t available.

  • dckiwi

    My 15 month old has a cell phone. I kid you not. It’s an iPhone with a broken home button and no sim though…. He can play peek-a-boo barn for a good 10-15 minutes. Because the home button is broken, he can’t leave the app (until he figures out how to launch sbsettings that is).

    Does that make me a bad parent?!

  • davrosdiablo

    My 7 year old is nowhere near getting a phone. I agree with sixftunda’s comment that she’s not going to be anywhere without adult supervision so she won’t need one.

    Question: Is there a way to get the phone company to prevent texts after a certain quantity? “I instruct you to prevent any further texts to be sent after I have met my limit”-type thing. In the same way that when your voicemail is full it doesn’t accept any more messages. If they don’t do it it must be easy to implement. At worst you can check your texting balance every day.

    Good luck!

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  • http://www.geardiary.com Michael Anderson

    @davrosdiablo: I would doubt it … it is like the scam Verizon has going where you cannot block internet access, so it you touch the wrong key it is $1.99 on your bill …

  • doogald

    We bought cell phones for our kids when they were doing things on a regular basis that was not necessarily consistent by time and needed a ride home – and started borrowing friends’ cell phones to call us. For my daughter, it was when she was a freshman in high school, and started running on the cross country team; for our son, we bought one when I was re-upping our family plan contract while he was in eighth grade, anticipating high school.

    While they were in middle school, they had specific after-school activities, but they were pretty scheduled end-times. Otherwise, they were in a location (a friend’s house) that had a phone that they could call us with if they needed a ride.

  • Mark Vlastelica

    If it was me I would wait until my child was at least 12 unless it’s for safety reasons, but if it’s just for texting that could be a problem. Texting in class is definitely more discrete than note passing and could cause her to be too distracted in class. Once you let them go out by themselves or give them more freedom to the point where neither parent will be around then I would definitely give my child a phone so that you can always have a line of connection. It sounds like you guys definitely have it together though because one of you is always at home and you meet her at the bus stop so she’s already always in touch with at least one of her parents. One thing to do so it doesn’t become a distraction for her is you could keep the phone at home when she goes to school and then once she’s back you could give it to her so she can text.

  • Locksmith

    I would strongly recommend a pay as you go phone. Kids don’t seem to be able to determine how long they are on the phone and will rack up huge useage charges. It has happened to everyone I know when they got their kids their first phone.

  • markntravis

    No child “needs” a cell phone.

  • http://www.geardiary.com Judie Lipsett

    @markntravis – some would argue that not many adults really “need” one, either.

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  • http://www.osnn.net Jewelzz

    I know times have changed from when my girls were younger (now 24 and 25) and have drastically changed from when I was a kid but what happen to calling friends from the home phone or better yet, walking over to their house to chat and visit. I think today’s technology has a hand in our children and society as a whole being out of shape and overweight. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a geek through and through and love new gadgets just as much as the next gal but I’d rather walk to a friends house to visit then call from my cell or Skype.

    Personally, I think 9 is way too young for a cell phone but it’s a personal issue and every parent has to weigh the pros and cons for each child. What’s good for your 9 year old daughter might not be good for your next child at the same age.

  • Michele in KS

    The deciding factor for us was when our daughter became more active in sports, scouts and after school activities. She is a 6th grader and often her plans change by the hour. She might want to go home on another bus with a friend or stay after school in the math lab. It just made sense that she be able to communicate with us in those situations. She might ride her bike over to a neighbors and needs to check in with us if they decide to ride to another friends or to the park. It gives her a little more freedom but we are still very much involved. We purchased a kajeet phone and set it up to only receive calls from us during school hours and no calls after 9 PM. She learned how to manage her minutes pretty quickly and we didn't have to worry about outrageous phone bills. I was so impressed with the service I became part of the Mom Sales Team and one of the benefits I can offer is 15% off any phone kajeet sells. Follow one of the links on my landing page that says “learn more” or “buy now” to see the service plans and phones available. My landing page address is http:www.kajeet.com/michele

  • leventsapci

    There is a pretty interesting debate going on between parents on this issue. Take a look at what other parents say:
    http://www.commonsensemedia.org/whats-right-age-kids-get-cell-phone