Planet Fitness Has Way to Keep You Coming Back


Our five year old washing machine died two weeks ago and had to be replaced. We were told, at the time, that five years is about the lifespan for this type of appliance these days. That’s not so surprising considering the fact that the 25-year-old dishwasher at our lake cabin is still going strong. Yes, companies want to keep you coming back as a repeat customer and the lifespan of many things is growing shorter and shorter in order to help ensure it.

It seems Planet Fitness has found a way to keep their customers coming back time and again as well. It’s a bit creative and fits with the New Years resolutions that people are about to make. (If I were going to be judgmental I might suggest that it is also a bit disturbing although other words initially came to mind.)

Here’s the method they use.

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Join Planet Fitness and you will enjoy a “pizza day” the first Monday of the month. Pizza is free and unlimited. Now I’m not opposed to pizza… actually I love it, but there are healthier things a fitness club can offer and making it unlimited when so many people have issue with portion control only serves to reinforce bad habits.

But wait, there is more. They also offer a bagel morning the first Tuesday of every month. Bagels are delicious but unless you go for whole grain bagels (which I doubt they offer) they are also made from highly processed flour that offers zero nutritional value. Again, there are healthier choice a Health Club can offer.

But there’s still more. Yes, the club has an ever-present bowl of tootsie rolls at the front desk all the time. (It reminds me of the local hospital that, until recently, had a McDonalds as the only food service for non-employees.) Planet Fitness is proud enough about this offering to include this on their website…

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And while I’m at it lets spend a second on their promise of non-judgmentalism since they are also proud of,

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Here’s the thing. If by non-judgement they mean,

“We won’t call you a worthless piece of dog crap because you are so overweight and don’t get off your couch even once at night.”

I’m with them. But if by non-judgmental they mean

“We won’t comment on your diet, on the fact that you are overweight and you need to take better care of yourself.”

(and I suspect that is the case) I’m definitely not with them. If I go to a doctor I want her telling me what I need to do. If I go to photography school I want to be told my pictures stink and how I can do better. And if I go to a gym I WANT them pushing me to be healthier.

Now, would you like a Coke to go with your bagel and pizza?

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About the Author

Dan Cohen
Having a father who was heavily involved in early laser and fiber-optical research, Dan grew up surrounded by technology and gadgets. Dan’s father brought home one of the very first video games when he was young and Dan remembers seeing a “pre-release” touchtone phone. (When he asked his father what the “#” and “*” buttons were his dad said, “Some day, far in the future, we’ll have some use for them.”) Technology seemed to be in Dan’s blood but at some point he took a different path and ended up in the clergy. His passion for technology and gadgets never left him. Dan is married to Raina Goldberg who is also an avid user of Apple products. They live in New Jersey with their golden doodle Nava.